Ok, lets set the scene.
It’s 9 PM on a Wednesday evening, you have just managed to sit yourself down on the sofa after spending the last 2 hours trying to get your little darlings to go to bed.
Finally, you’ve got your mega comfy Primarni pjs on, you’ve made yourself a cuppa and got yourself a few biscuits, because we all know we need that sugar rush. Just enough to get us to the end of the day and have that little bit of much needed ‘Me Time’.
Aaaahhh, Me Time
….that time of the day when no one is shouting ‘Mum’, that time no one needs us, no one is fighting for our attention. Just, you and that cuppa. A warm cuppa at that. Pure bliss.
You pull out your phone, laptop, tablet…whatever you have to hand, because we all know, you’re not moving off that sofa! Not after the day you’ve had! School runs, working, housework. You know the drill.
First thing you do is check out your social media accounts. Who doesn’t like a nosey at what everyone else is up to?!
You watch a few videos, read a few groups posts. Then you come across your fellow Mummy friends posts.
Dun, Dun, duuuuunnnnn…
Wow! How do they look like the perfect family?! Their kids all smiling and cuddling each other! Playing nicely together. When all your kids do is want to kill each other.
Their homes look so tidy and spotless. You look around your living room which has toys everywhere, the kids school bags dumped in a corner, a pile of ironing in the basket that you just don’t have the energy to do.
You check out photos of the perfect, homemade, nutritionally balanced family meals. When you gave your kids chicken nuggets, chips and beans (a staple here, by the way) because you know that is the only thing your kids will eat without a fuss!
The posts of those Mums at the gym, looking all sweaty and toned, looking glamorous! You, look down, checking out your Mum Tum and dunk another biscuit in the knowledge it will make you feel better.
Posts of Mums bragging how they have the kids uniforms all laid out ready for the next morning. You know for a fact, your kids uniforms are on the, what I like to call ‘Floor-drobe’ in piles, creased to death.
PIN ME FOR LATER
You Think To Yourself…
How on earth do all of these other Mum look like they have their shit together, when all you have the energy to do at the end of the day is lay on the sofa with a cuppa?!
How do they not struggle?!
Seeing all these Insta-Mums and Pinterest worthy photos, you feel so inadequate….
A proper crap Mum!
You start comparing yourself, thinking that you’re not good enough.
Well Mama, have I got news for you!
I promise you, you are not alone. Seriously, you’re not!
Give Yourself Some Credit!
- You’re the one that keeps everything going.
- You’re the one that cleans the house from top to bottom.
- Puts the laundry in the washer, irons and puts it all away.
- You’re on call 24/7 to your children’s needs. ‘Mum, can I have a drink?’ ‘Mum, I can’t do it, can you do it?’ ‘Mum, I want that because so and so has it’.
- You make sure everyone is fed and watered.
- Get everyone to where they should be on time.
- You put everyones needs before your own
I could go on…the list of Mum jobs is endless!
Take a step back…
Look at the bigger picture. Think about how much your family rely on you and how much you have done today ‘just’ as your role as MUM! Look at how much you have achieved!
Now, as for all of these ‘perfect’ social media posts and photos. Don’t take it all to heart.
Certainly, don’t ever compare yourself to anyone else.
Social media give a delusional image of what life ‘should’ be like. The image of a perfect life.
No one has the ‘perfect’ life!
Take a look at your social media news feed, everyone only posts all of the good stuff! Am I right?
Now tell me, where are the photos of kids fighting? Where are the photos of the burnt meals? (we’ve all done it…surely I can’t be the only one!) Where are the posts of mums praising their Mum Tums and stretch marks?!
Look at those photos of completely tidy homes. I can guarantee it’s not like that 24/7. Or if the camera was turned around you would see that the complete room isn’t tidy!
Social media only lets you see snippets of other peoples lives.
As long as you and your family are happy, healthy and well cared for what more is there to do?!
Don’t focus on other people and what they’re doing!
Don’t compare yourself to others. This is something i am guilty of. I used to do this a lot and it made me so unhappy. Pulling myself down, put so much pressure on myself. I had really high expectations of myself as a mum. Especially as a mum of 5. I know we can’t have it all! I just know what I want for myself and my family and that’s what I focus on.
The struggle is real, but with mums supporting mums we can rock Motherhood together!
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Tales From Mamaville