3 Things to Do When Separating from a Partner

woman and man sitting on brown wooden bench

The breakdown of any relationship can be upsetting, but a separation can be particularly traumatic when children are involved. Many parents delay splitting up or getting divorced because they’re worried about the impact it will have on their kids. However, there are ways to separate from a partner amicably and without animosity. 

If you’re thinking about divorce, or you’re already going through a separation, take a look at these three tools that can help you to cope with the situation:

1. Get Legal Advice

If you’re married or have a civil partner, it’s important to get legal advice before you agree to any separation terms. Furthermore, if you share children with your partner, you’ll want to obtain legal advice, regardless of whether you’re married or in a civil partnership. 

When a relationship breaks down, there are many matters that need to be resolved. From who owns the shared property to custody arrangements, you’ll need to know what your rights are in order to make plans for the future. 

2. Gather Evidence

Sadly, some relationships break down because one partner is abusive to another. Whether this is physical, emotional or sexual abuse, it can have a devastating impact on the people affected. Even if this type of abuse hasn’t occurred throughout the relationship, a partner may behave inappropriately during the separation process.

Due to this, it’s important to record any inappropriate behaviours or actions. It can be tricky to prove emotional abuse, for example, but keeping records of such incidents can help to build up a picture of your ex-partner’s conduct. The ONRECORD web and mobile app is an effective way to record this information in a private and confidential location. By keeping a log of behaviours, comments or conduct, you can prove exactly what’s been happening and describe the incidents in your own words. 

3. Talk to Someone

Dealing with an emotional situation alone can be difficult but talking to someone often helps. When you’re separating from a partner, you might find it hard to confide in family or friends, particularly if they remain close to the other party. However, this shouldn’t prevent you from getting the support you need.

Many people find it helpful to speak with a therapist or counsellor during the separation process. Often, it’s beneficial to get an independent and objective vantage point, which family and friends will be unable to provide. As well as seeking professional support for yourself, you may want to consider whether your kids could benefit from speaking to a children’s therapist. With external guidance and support, kids can learn to navigate their new lifestyle more easily and have an outlet for any worries or concerns they may have. 

Dealing with the End of a Relationship

Whether you’ve been with someone for years or only a few months, the end of a relationship can be tough to cope with. By seeking help from a variety of sources, you can ensure you have the practical, financial and emotional support you need as you move on to a new chapter of your life.

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